Christmas Gift
Well I feel dumb. Back in July, after the first ultrasound, we scheduled today’s appointment. Obviously I never read the letter clear enough because the true purpose of today’s appointment went completely over my head. I assumed we were going in for another ultrasound was so excited. I wanted to know myself the sex of the baby and to tell you all. I was planning to have Tim take photos of me during it and to include that and a sonogram on this post. By now you must be wondering what did happen.
We got our bus and connecting bus on time, got confused on arrival because there seemed to be more people in the Obstetrics area than last time and we actually waited in a waiting room, unlike last time when we tried to find our destination and then just heard my name called. A nurse came in and took us to an office. I started off confused. I kept telling her “I have an ultrasound,” but it never seemed to register with her, nor did the fact that we don’t speak Norwegian and have to roughly translate whatever is said in the language. We went to her office where she attempted an explanation of how their new system works in taking information about me, writing it on another form to be entered in their computer system so they have it on file next month or whenever I call for information, etc. She asked me questions I barely understood to enter on the form, most of which were answered on forms of mine she had in front of her. I patiently answered her questions figuring after the paperwork was done we’d get to the spiffy technology and see our not-so-little one. At times during her work and then after she asked about my pregnancy and “explained” (again, I could barely understand her) things about the hospital and wanted to know if I had any questions. While I have a list prepared specifically for our two evening course (In English!) next week, I gave her one or two. I don’t know if it was just the miscommunication but she didn’t seem as calm as my midwife or even the doctor I’ve seen. She asked about my job and if I no longer worked there because of a problem. She explained why the head-down position is necessary for an easier delivery. She offered information on a few pain-relievers. One was a bath which I accepted but had to decline a couple times an epidural and acupuncture. I don’t know why she didn’t understand at first that I didn’t want either. She went over all this stuff I already know as if I’m completely clueless. Kari Janne, our midwife treats us very differently, she is also very easy to understand and so calming (not that I worry). I kept asking about or mentioning the ultrasound but it always seemed to go over her head. I don’t need this stress of miscommunication. I really hope this doesn’t happen next month! After we’d sat for a while and she realized we didn’t have any questions for her, she got up and said goodbye…. 
I read and reread the letter about the appointment and it finally got through that we weren’t there for an ultrasound but just what we’d already done. I’ve heard before that normally here there is only one ultrasound, and I thought, “Ok, but I have a 2nd.” Apparently there is always only one unless there are special circumstances or problems. I’ve had a wonderfully normal pregnancy. It is possible in the 18th week to determine the sex of the baby but in Norway they won’t tell you. I’ve heard that some non-native residents (Middle Easterners?) respond negatively to a female child and Norway does what it can to prevent abortions. So I guess no one here ever knows the sex beforehand. You are always surprised.
Upon realizing my mistake I was very upset but attempted to hold it in. But as we got our coats, I started and could not stop crying (not loudly… but tears came forth). I’d been so excited to find out and spread the news and by my own error I’d let myself way down. 
Poor Tim tried to comfort me by telling me my hair looked nice. I think it took about 15-20 minutes to get myself together. I just needed to get out and away from people so I could really relax and just let it out but it wasn’t really possible. By the time we got on the bus I was better and was able to explain to Tim why I was so upset.
So now we must come up with a boy’s name and a middle name for a girl. And as Tim said, this little one will be a real Christmas gift, we have no idea what we’re getting.
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