Momma’s Angel

Sunday School September 6, 2008

We reach another milestone with Sara Ellen tomorrow. She will be attending sunday school for two year olds at Calvary. I think she should enjoy it. At the least, she should not be unhappy because she is accustomed to the church and loves going for any reason. Yay! I think she will like spending time with the other kiddies, I’ve seen her play very well with others whatever their age.

The tricky part is the class takes place during the 9 am service…. We always attend the 11 am service, but she is too old for nursery so we’ve reached the point where we have to get up early. I’m going to be a little yawny and have to get us together fast … right.

The time is not the only tricky part actually, I agreed to help teach the class. There are supposed to be teams of two to switch weeks so that means I’d get to worship too. I’m just not sure what I’ve gotten myself into. The only reason I’ve taught kids in the past is to make money leading them in crafts and dance. I don’t often look forward to structured engagements, I get frazzled. Now, the church class is for 2 year olds so it won’t require so much teaching as caring and a little thematic guidance. But there is a curriculum which I’d rather leave to others.

It might not be so bad. It’s just as I said, I get nervous. We may be moving out of the area in a few months, only God knows where, so I may not be doing it long.

Genesis September 3, 2008

I love to read and consider scripture but I never know where to start. I have for the longest time wondered what to do. During all my fervor reading the Twilight Saga, I spoke to my brother about wanting to read scripture. He helped me remember a place to start is the plan for reading the Bible in a year, 3 chapters Monday - Saturday, and 5 chapters on Sunday. So I have begun at the beginning and have been doing well. I’ve enjoyed it too, reading the names and trying to connect them. I am even writing my thoughts on things that stick out to me. So for something a little different from my latest posts, here is my scripture “study” thus far. It’s a little choppy but it’s just the train of my thoughts written in my journal.

Chapters 10 - 17 for Saturday and Sunday.
All nations come from Noah, the one descendant of Adam and Eve rescued by the Lord. The descendants of Noah make up chapter 10. They fill the earth and are scattered. Eventually God causes them to speak many languages. The time a man has on Earth decreases. Noah had lived to be some 900 years old. By the time Abraham is 99 he disbelieves he and Sarah would have any sons.
He travels to Egypt. Aren’t they his family if everyone is descended from Noah?? They have forgotten where they came from and people are evil again but God’s covenant with Noah promises he will not destroy the earth again.

Abraham’s first son is Ishmael. Is he the father of Islam or is that Esau? Abraham is supposed to be the common link between Christian’s and Muslims. Ishmael’s mother Hagar is an Egyptian maid servant to Sarah. God tells Hagar Ishmael will be the father of nations and princes. That must be great to hear but God promises Abraham he will be the father of many nations and He will keep a covenant with Isaac. The Lord is doing everything He can to save His people. He begins making rules which should keep them close to His heart, but they/we always go astray. Rule #1 male circumsision. Why?? Is it just a physical difference between His people and others? It’s not necessary for health, as least not now, and it’s painful.

Genesis 19 & 20
There is a lot of incest and deceit going on. The Lord saved Lot and his family from Soddom and Gomorrah’s destruction though they would not save themselves. His sons-in-law thought it was a joke and his wife looked back when told not to. Then the daughter’s are afraid of never meeting a man and having children so they intoxicate their father and bed him! Never meet a man? The only reason they are alive is because their uncle (?Abraham) fought for their righteousness. It seems they had only just been married and had not been with their husbands. Did they know in the past how to track fertility or is it luck or what? How would Lot react? Or the Lord? Lot’s line is furthered but is God not punishing the act? Then Abraham and Sarah do the brother/sister act again and she is nearly had by another man. More is made of this deception than of Lot’s daughters’. The women of the land are punished because of Abimelech’s (ruler of Gerar) ignorant act. It doesn’t seem fair. He is being tricked, his people suffer and Abraham and Sarah received wealth yet again and sent on their way. What’s going on? The men always get angry that they’ve been causing them to nearly take another man’s wife. Do A & S just not believe God’s promise or is he just a coward? Perhaps it is like the sermon Sunday. It does not matter what they are, but what they are becoming - parent’s of a great nation.

Today’s Reading - Chapters 24-26

26:6-11
Isaac lives near Abimelech just like his father. And, just like his father, Isaac fears for his safety on account of his beautiful wife, Rebekah ;-). Isaac says he is her brother but was eventually caught “showing endearment to [her].” The men had not touched her and the women had not been punished but Abumelech feared for the guilt they could have felt. He does not ask them to leave but it seems they move outside the city and try to reestablish Abraham’s wells.

26:13 - I find this funny. It speaks of Isaac.
“The man began to prosper, and continued prospering until he became very prosperous.”

Harry and Bella September 1, 2008

I have seen a lot of comparisons of Harry Potter and Twilight, most for the wrong reasons. My sister however brought up some legitimate comparisons and helped me to think of more.

~They are, as far as they know, very ordinary people

~They have lived ordinary lives, perhaps even less than ordinary lives. Harry lives in a closet, receiving from his relations the very least they can afford to give him. Bella doesn’t quite live an average teenage life, few friends, taking care of her mother. She has no reason to think moving to Forks will be any better, actually she believes it will be worse.

~They unwillingly find themselves famous. Many desire his or her friendship. Others think they are nothing special and treat them disdainfully.

~Discovering magic/the supernatural is the best and most challenging thing that has ever happened to them.

~They fight very personal battles to stay alive.

How not to compare them - generally, as in “Twilight is way better than Harry Potter“! “Harry is childish and boring. Twilight is exciting and hot!”

~Harry was born a wizard, he already had powers to fight with and learns to use them quickly out of need. He is not alone, he has friends from which to draw strength.

~Bella is a frail human. She is mentally strong but seems to attract threatening situations for which she is ill equiped to handle alone. She does not have close friends with whom she can be honest. The one closest to her heart is the most dangerous and also quite illusive.

~The story of Harry Potter is that of an amazing character, an average boy who becomes a wizard and faces incredible odds. He uses his instincts and the foundation of his relationships to do what is right.

~The story of Bella and Edward is a romance. A seemingly ordinary girl who awakens a 100 year old vampire from his monotonous life. He overcomes his hunger for her blood and finds a desire to be more man than monster. They bring life to eachothers existence.

Summer Movies 2008 August 26, 2008

I love movies. I love good action movies, chick flicks, historically-based, superheros, animated movies (Pixar is the best). Obviously they have to be well thought out, have an engaging story, not be action for actions sake, or very gory. I have standards, yes I do. There are several movies I am really looking forward to this summer. What follows is a linked list and even photos.I have added some thoughts from seeing the movies, but I’ll try not to spoil it, just basically give me yay or nay.

• Made of Honor Release Date: May 2 2008 This will be like a reverse of My Best Friend’s Wedding, although the previews show him being more helpful than sneaky. I really like Patrick Dempsey in Enchanted and Sweet Home Alabama. This is such a fun chick flick. It’s funny and a bit similar to MBFW except that he works to be the perfect MOH to lure her away from Duke Charming. I look forward to seeing it again.
• The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian Release date: Friday, May 16th, 2008. In older film adaptations of these stories, the Lucy character really bugged me. In the Adamson adaptation, Lucy is adventurous, and kind, with the child’s willingness to believe, which sets her apart from her siblings. As for the story, how strange it must be to grow up in Narnia, return home where no time has past, then return to Narnia which has seen 1,000 years since their departure.
• Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull Release Date: Thursday, May 22nd, 2008. I LOVE Harrison Ford/Indiana Jones and Shia LaBeouf is great too (he was good in Transformers, but Holes is my favorite).Tim and I saw this together and Harrison Ford was his slightly goofy, know-it-all self. Shia LeBeouf was a nice addition, he’s done well for himself. There are some who don’t like the origins of their discovery, and I agree it’s a little weird, but I still thinks it was a good show. I will likely add it to the collection I already have.
• Get Smart Release Date: Friday, June 20th, 2008. Steve Carrell and Anne Hathaway!Haha, so much fun. The language is clean. I still found the previewed jokes funny. I love Anna Hathaway. Cone of silence, it’s not working… in the movie. Sara Ellen has her own. And a good twist I didn’t see coming though I think Tim was suspicious.
• WALL·E Release Date: Friday, June 27th, 2008. You have to see the preview, I love saying the name. “Waaaal-ie.”This was great. I was wondering how much of the movie would be without speaking but there is pretty clear communication and it’s obvious the mess that has been made of the earth. When there are people, it’s sad the place they’ve come to but hooray for determined minds. We brought Sara Ellen and she basically sat still the whole time watching! (We had a trial run, going to see Bee Movie for free at the BowTie Kids Summer Program.)
• Hancock Release Date: July 2 2008. Will Smith is awesome and the previews are so funny.This is great. The language is pretty average. From what I’ve seen this is different for Will Smith, the lazy, jerk, alcoholic, and he was great. Jason Bateman was good for his PR and this is probably one of few times I’ve Charlize Theron and I liked her. There is a really good twist that I don’t remember any preview hints for.
• The Dark Knight Release Date: Friday, July 18th, 2008. I really enjoyed most of Heath Ledgers movies. Sadly I think this will be a creepy last one.We finally saw Dark Knight and it was great. The Joker is completely creepy but the movie was as dark as I feared and there isn’t a dull moment. I’ll warn you, it’s LONG, just under 3 hours. I didn’t realize how long and Tim didn’t realize how late our show was (9:45!) so we were out late! Is there going to be another with Christian Bale? The end made me think so but I don’t know. He’s my favorite Batman I’ve seen. I love how his voice becomes a growl at Batman. And I love Maggie Gyllenhaal as Rachel Dawes! I also enjoyed seeing where Two-Face comes from, though I was surprised he didn’t last very long. Though I should have realized that when he talked about “living long enough to see yourself become the villian”. Batman wasn’t going to actually become the villian, just appear to be, sorry for spoiling it. Anyway, it’s awesome. I do want to see it again.
• The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 Release Date: August 8 2008. Yay Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants and Alexis Bladel!!!I saw this with my sister and how ever many other females could fit in the smallish theater, plus a few males. I haven’t read the books at all but the story was pretty good. Funny was hearing the reactions, sighs, etc. from the younger girls. I could see the story from a grown up perspective.

• I have also seen Wanted and I don’t recommend it. While I love James McAvoy, and he was good, I don’t like seriously violent, crazy action movies. I had to look away a bit but I’m betting guys liked it. Aside from that, the story goes well beyond suspension of disbelief! Some of the special effects are nuts and the “history” the story follows has a lot of holes. I saw with a girlfriend so I don’t know Tim’s male-perspective thoughts.

Why All The Fuss August 25, 2008

Somebody asked me why I had a crush on Edward Cullen. Well… are crushes rational? First reason, he is exciting. Second reason, I’m reading from Bella’s perspective and she’s mad over him. After being asked, I had time to think, I also had time to keep reading and see their relationship develop. I found that as they developed a real relationship with communication and trust, I loved them as a couple as well and I suppose you could say I matured back to my non-high school self. (I was a senior nine years ago after all.) And the movie cast photos I liked the most were less of Edward, mysterious, slighty creepy and more, Edward and Bella happy together.

However, I have seen mucho previews and trailers for the movie, including the exclusive preview on the dvd for Penelope (which is an awesome flick with Christian Ricci, Reese Witherspoon [as a punk!] and James McAvoy) and we (Kate and I) were so excited we watched it four times! The craziness has returned but it’s more like seeing someone you love everyday and then getting a glimpse of them reminding you while they are so special to you.

Here is another way of saying it. I found an interview with the screenwriter for the movie, Melissa Rosenberg: Shock: What do you think the fan base is responding to with these novels?
Rosenberg: I think it’s a number of things. To begin with Bella, we’ve all been that girl. For women, anyway. We’ve all been this human, fallible person. And the vampire lore lends itself to the ultimate unattainable love. That longing we have felt, that delicious longing. I think that’s why the lore itself is so popular. For Stephenie, she has created this family of these somewhat unattainable, mystical people who are good. They’re accessible. She lays it out so slowly, she lures you in - because it’s being told from Bella’s point of view, you’re experiencing Edward and his family from her point of view. Little by little, you’re learning who this beautiful guy is and drawing you into just how human he is. Stephenie’s pacing and characters just draw you in.

Love Stories August 22, 2008

Last Saturday a friend loaned me her copies of books 1 - 3 in a growing series by Stephenie Meyer. They are Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse. The fourth, Breaking Dawn has recently been released and I expect to read it soon.

It’s a gripping story of a girl (Bella) who moves from the big city to a small town and falls for a vampire (Edward). Luckily he practices a “vegetarian” lifestyle and only drinks the blood of animals, how else would he manage to pretend to be a high school student. He needs reminding of that fact when he gets a breeze of her scent. I started reading Sunday or Monday and finished 3 long books in 4 days! To finish books two and three I was up until 5 am! I could not put them down. I started 2 immediately after finishing 1 at 6pmish Tuesday and read through till the end. Tim is away in Norway this week and next and my parents and sister are away this week. My brother is home but I don’t see him much and I get pretty tired of doing the same stuff with Sara Ellen but don’t know what else to do. It’s so lonely without Tim working from home. The readings have been the most exciting thing going on for me this week and I definitley developed a crush on Edward, especially after seeing photos from the upcoming movie. The story is very seductive and addictive.

Read on but beware of potential spoilers - (more…)

Sara Ellen’s 1st Night Away August 17, 2008

I only recently returned home, bringing out of the car a napping Sara Ellen from her first incredibly successful night away from home/parents!

A couple weeks ago Tim, his parents, and I planned for Sara Ellen to have a trial sleepover, to see if she’s ready for that before Tim and I try to take any overnight trips together. When we planned it, Tim did not yet have an itinerary to Oslo. That is perhaps only significant because it meant I was alone and lonely for a bit. Actually I was lonely even before S was gone because Mom, Dad, and Emily drove away Friday to vacation in Maine, Tim flew off to Norway that night, and I rarely see Michael even though he is usually home. We’ve spent the last few days at home so yesterday I was bored of the same toys and had no idea what I would do with myself in the evening. I got in touch with a friend, Kate, and hoped she could come over for some cost-free fun. Sara Ellen took her nap in the afternoon and I let “Nana” know when she could expect S to be awake and ready for departure. I think she woke up just a few minutes before Jan arrived. We talked a little bit and I put Sara Ellen in her seat after hugs and kisses. She loves all her grandparents and we have slept there before so I was confident she would enjoy herself, and if necessary, I knew they would call.

As I took a shower I heard from Kate and afterwards confirmed she would be over by 7! Yay, I wouldn’t have to spend the evening alone! I did a little bit of cleaning and Kate arrived with food in hand. She shared her sandwich and we made mac and cheese while chatting for a bit before choosing to watch Pan’s Labyrinth. After that I introduced her to Wii Fit which she highly enjoyed and Wii Play. I won Harry Potter SceneIt and Kate headed home after 11. What an almost miracle to stay up late and play for my own enjoyment! I stayed up a bit longer to watch Charmed and start reading Little Women before going to sleep at 12:30 and sleeping for 7 uninterrupted hours.

I was up in time to attend Worship by the Water and get Michael back home before attending nursery kiddies. It was interesting to notice my parental attitude even without Sara Ellen. I spent a lot of time babysitting “in my youth” and when a 3 y.o. had mini-meltdowns I responded as I do now, trying to calm her without just giving her a pretzel like she wanted. Her 1 y.o. brother however I gave an extra cracker earlier because he’d started out quite unhappy, but she hadn’t minded. I picked both those 2 up, separately and they are so light in comparison. Sara Ellen has never been chubby. She just must be all muscle. She can sure put food away and must burn it all!

Jan and I had agreed they would call when they were ready to bring S home. I realized this morning I had only considered her wanting me that we never set an end time. I called after church and said I’d come over for lunch, etc. She was completely happy when I came in and barely said hello. She was just hanging around eating crackers and walking between “Papa” inside and Aunt JP on the porch, opening and closing the screen door herself. I heard a little about the visit, “she’s a delight” and eventually got us both into swimsuits for a dip before going home. We never did eat lunch. But oh, did she gobble up dinner last night and breakfast! Several servings of beef-a-roni and beans, two peaches. She surprised them by asking for crackers at 11:30pm but I let them know she does sleep better with a snack. Fred checked on her through semi-opened eyelids as it got to that time, I think she was watching Little Mermaid. This morning she ate 3 or 4 scrambled eggs (I had “warned” them about her love of eggs) before going to their church where I’m sure she was admired. After about 15 minutes of their outdoor service, Fred took her to the play area. I heard he was nervous about her climbing habits at the park yesterday. She’s learned to go down the fireman’s pole at our beach playground.

I almost couldn’t get her out of their house. She did start down the stairs but kept going to Aunt JP’s room and had a kissing binge before JP carried her out. She fell asleep on the way home. I think she feel asleep yesterday at the same time. Well, we certainly know she’s happy without us. Being a mother at home is a huge job and with a bunch of time to myself I realize she can be perfectly happy without me. Fred said she didn’t ask about me once, it’s the wonder of being too busy having fun. I did too!

Outside posts on images of breastfeeing July 13, 2008

I’ve been catching up on reading one of my favorite blogs, the Motherwear Breastfeeding Blog, sponsored by the nursing garb company Motherwear. Tanya who writes blog posted an article from the Catholic News Service speaking on the removal and reintroduction of images of the Virgin Mary Breastfeeding Jesus the Christ. Following a link from a reader’s comment, I found a post by Christopher West, a research fellow and faculty member of the Theology of the Body Institute. He writes on Nursing a Sexually Wounded Culture.

These are great posts and so encouraging to me that I can be the complete version of myself as God intended!

Listening June 22, 2008

Have you heard the idea of being silent before God? Spending time in prayer, not asking for things but listening to what the Lord may say to you. I find this difficult to do, not just not speaking but keeping my mind quiet. I heard an idea lately for meditation, choosing one word and focusing on it while being silent. Then you allow whatever happens to happen. Thoughts flow through your mind, memories, sadness, tiredness. I don’t think you are supposed to fall asleep. Is this one way to let God speak to me?

These days I am trying to fill our days with regular fun, interesting outtings, and restorative quiet time all while playing a waiting game of sorts. We have a time line for finding our own home, by this November/December. It’s been a long time coming. We’re pretty cramped in my parent’s home and we need room to grow and live as our own family unit. I’m ready for the adventure, whatever it is. Accepting a new place be it far or near, being willing to find a church, medical care givers, and a place to dance. And that is what I have been praying about, being ready for whatever opportunities come our ways.

My Sleep Breakthrough May 17, 2008

I was raised on, and have subscribed to the Attachment Parenting philosophy. Probably the easiest way to describe it is learning and responding to Baby’s/Child’s cues. For me, life has been easiest when Sara Ellen slept with, or near me, breastfed when she requested, and was worn (or held). I also agree with the La Leche League mantra that breastfeeding works best when it’s beneficial to both mother and baby. This also applies to the previous parenting actions.

Obviously, things have changed some as Sara Ellen has grown. She is now my nursing toddler, so she eats lots of other foods but still loves “mommy milk” a few times during the day. She loves to run around on her own, though she still rides in Ergo Baby Carrier from time to time. She also still has a place in our bed though she has her own “little bed”. The latter is what has changed for the so-much-better this week.

As I said, she still loves breastfeeding. But it is beneficial for me to refuse at times and steer her onto other food or another activity (funny how nursing is both). Infants are wired to nurse at times during the night, that’s just how they are made. However, Sara Ellen carried that habit into toddlerhood. I’m the type of parent who enables her child to grow at their own pace, move into new stages without force. HOWEVER, I don’t sleep as soundly as I did when she was an infant and she no longer just nurses and falls asleep, she likes to go back and forth. The latching on wakes me up, and if it keeps happening… I don’t wake up rested. I become quick to annoy and prone to use the loud scolding voice Sara Ellen does not like. Instead of bright-eyes and bushy tailed, it’s more like bushy-eyed.

This past Wednesday, we had a night like that and had a horrible morning. Absolutely horrible. I know that it is possible for her to fall asleep without nursing so I decided that night I would make a change. Into that choice, I included trying to get her back into her own bed. I tried it several months ago with a fit of crying on her part and that’s what happened. I don’t like “crying it out” but at least I was with her. I hoped she would fall asleep. After a while there was a knock at the door and my mother reported she could not sleep so I grudgingly brought Sara Ellen in to bed. I was still determined not to nurse her to sleep because that encourages the nursing through the night. Instead I told her stories and such. She was worn out already and went to sleep. I think I may have nursed her once during the night but just once and she went back to sleep. We woke up in the morning, both bright-eyed!!! She had her morning milk, which I’m not opposed to, and our day went well. I repeated the no-nursing bedtime Thursday, but without the forcing her stay in her bed. She didn’t want stories so I sang Veggie Tales songs. At some point she rolled over and went to sleep! I think I actually stayed up and read, and woke sometime around 4 and couldn’t fall back to sleep but that was my head and the weather’s fault. Another good morning. And a third!!!

I have heard stories of parents deciding to get their baby to sleep alone in their crib and how they feel so refreshed after a good night’s sleep. While I won’t force that on any future children, I am so glad to have found a bedtime routine that works for us now!!! I’m sure when Tim comes home tomorrow and experiences these results, he’ll be relieved as well.